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A New Year

2010 brought me many difficult times but it also brought me the most amazing daughter in the world. There are no words to describe my feelings for her and although it wasn't planned, I wouldn't change a thing. She is my life, my world and everything I have ever dreamed of.

I have had many tough times with my dystonia. My spasms have become more frequent and annoying but mostly painful. While I'm sitting on the floor playing with Hailey my legs will just lock up. While feeding her, my neck has gotten stuck. It's the scariest thing I've ever experienced. The insurance here in FL is out of control but I have finally found something. I will be seeing a specialist at the end of January in Gainesville at the Dystonia clinic. I am hoping to get botox injections in my arm to relieve some of the pain and discomfort. I will no longer be able to breastfeed which breaks my heart because it is such an enjoyable bonding time for me and Hailey. But, without botox to help my arm, holding her will become harder and harder. I need to do this for Hailey even though getting her to have formula isn't easy... she hated her first bottle!!

Anyways, Hailey is doing great. We went to MA for Christmas and New Years so she could meet all of our family. She loved everyone and they all loved her. It was so good to finally show her off although it was very tough to say goodbye. She was a bit spoiled and now just wants to be held but thats ok because snuggling with her is my favorite thing to do.
She's growing so fast. Lately it seems like she's eating non-stop! She must be going through a growth spurt. She will be starting on cereal soon and before I know it she'll be crawling around! She's growing too fast but I am enjoying every minute of it.

I am very excited for 2011... watching my daughter grow, getting better and moving back to MA when Ryans done school. It's going to be an amazing new year.

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